If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried! - Author Unknown
How the hell do you get fired on your day off?! - Author Unknown
Most of us know how to say nothing; few of us know when.. - Author Unknown
A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths. - Author Unknown
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else. - Author Unknown
How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand! - Author Unknown
Love is like a game of chess: One false move and you're mated. - Author Unknown
Will the people in the cheaper seats clap your hands? And the rest of you, if you'll just rattle your jewelry. - John Lennon
I'm always making a comeback, but nobody never tells me where I've been.. - Billie Holiday
Due to lack of interest, tomorrow has been cancelled. - Author Unknown
